To Whisper a Doxology in the Darkness By: Susan Deborah Schiller Photo Credit: Akiane Gallery, License purchased in 2010 To be grateful for an unanswered prayer, to give thanks in a state of interior desolation, to trust in the love of God in the face of the marvels, cruel circumstances, obscenities, and commonplaces of life […]
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Reinvention through Resurrection By: Susan Deborah Schiller Previous Chapter: The Suicide Notice "…Hope knows that if great trials are avoided, great deeds remain undone and the possibility of growth into greatness of soul is aborted.… When tragedy makes its unwelcome appearance and we are deaf to everything but the shriek of our own agony, when courage flies […]
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An Encounter at God's Beauty Spa By: Susan Deborah Schiller What if the abuse you've endured serves to make you bigger, better, and more beautiful? What if what scares you turns into your greatest source of blessing? What if the ugliest things you've seen and heard are being used to make you more beautiful? What if the weapon […]
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Give What You Have By: Susan Deborah Schiller I offer you another chapter from my memoir, "On the Way Home". This chapter takes place in 2011, a time when my husband abandoned me in the desert and ran off with another woman. I was trying to restart my life in an unfamiliar city. * * * * * * * * * * […]
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The Truth Cannot be Extinguished By: Susan Deborah Schiller The light shines in the darkness and the darkness does not understand it, and cannot extinguish it… – Madeleine L'Engle Hope is a Light shining in the darkness, even if at first it's just a tiny beam. Even on days when I'm straining to focus on […]
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A Flower Still Blooms By: White Dove In the deep silence of a rural Wyoming midnight, there was no immediate answer to my questions. Just a whisper, an invitation to see sociopathic abuse through a new lens. It is a year I’ll never forget, a season of walking a solitary path through the dark night […]
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The Courage to Go Public By: Susan Deborah Schiller "Go public with your diaries," whispered a voice I've come to trust as my heavenly father's. "But instead of writing the past, I want you to write your future," he continued. Since then, I've joined a growing army of "heart scribes" and we are writing ourselves into […]
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Love from Papa By: White Dove What I hear Papa saying… "Let's talk about provision, even in winter," I heard Papa God whisper to me. In my mind's eye I saw an apple orchard, like the one in my backyard… the emotions of abundance, freedom, and beauty came with that memory. "I want to give you […]
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Beware of the strong woman! By: White Dove Warning: Trigger alert. Please don't read if you are sensitive to images of family violence. "I'm ashamed of you! Why can't you have more grace?" said my pastor, after telling him I was divorcing my husband. We were just shy of our 20-year anniversary and the LAST […]
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. The Antidote to Shame is Empathy By: White Dove Inside of each of us is a Light so bright it has the power to create a new world. “Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that […]
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Nothing is Impossible By: Susan Deborah Schiller "There is nothing you cannot do," says Tao Porchon-Lynch, 96-year old yoga instructor and ballroom dancer. You may wonder what a yoga instructor has to do with surviving sociopathic abuse. How can her version of "impossible" possibly relate to your living nightmare? You've been beaten for over two […]
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Predators in the Pulpit: Anatomy of a Seduction Trigger Alert: This post may not be suitable for all persons, nor for younger people.The purpose of writing this article in the 1st person of Evil is to allow you inside the head of a predator who was using the pulpit to access his victims. I have […]
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Wounds are Windows for the Glory of God By: Susan Deborah Schiller Our wounds are windows that show God’s artwork shining through the mosaic of our soul. I believe it’s silence and solitude that cause our inner flame to glow. Silence and solitude are our companions on the journey within, which I call “On the Way […]
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What Do You Want? By: White Dove What if a simple question, "What do you want?" were to reset your compass needle? What if following your dream is a God-given mandate that you not only deserve but are required to pursue? It certainly helps to know your destination! As an abuse survivor, I discovered that […]
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Sometimes Pain is a Gift By: Susan Deborah Schiller There was a time to break my silence and to tell my story of how I lived as a battered preacher's wife for 20 years in an abusive marriage, with more than 10 years of consequences in the aftermath of sociopathic abuse. And now is a time […]
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Rising Up from the Ashes of Defeat By: Susan Deborah Schiller "Can anyone hear my silence? Can they hear my tortured screams behind closed doors? Do they see the bruises in my soul, so painful I am crying every day?" These words were penned years ago in one of my journals, following a particularly difficult […]
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By: Susan Deborah Schiller in the series "Create Your World" Have you ever felt like you were constantly in a state of reacting to what is happening around you? Shari, a reader, shared the following story with me: "I feel dead. It started 10-years ago and it's only gotten worse. The doctors gave me an EEG […]
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Reclaiming Your Joy By: Susan Deborah Schiller A sure clue that your identity has been stolen is when you lose your joy in life. You end up in the routine of chores and responsibilies but your own needs are often neglected. You support others while letting your own dreams die. For years, I woke up […]
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Never Alone By: Susan Deborah Schiller A little chapter in my mini-memoir, where I learned that God is in the daily details of our lives. Jumping into my boots I launch myself into the icy Wyoming wind to break ice on the troughs. It's one of those times when I nearly persuade myself that I am alone. I call myself, "The […]
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The Lone Rancher Lessons By: Susan Schiller I looked out the window and said to myself, "Sue, you've got to get those horses out of the pasture and into the corral." My husband usually took care of that. He just saddled up and rounded those horses right into the corral. I was just in the […]
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