Have you ever wandered through your family's photo albums and wondered, "Who is that?" or wondered what they were doing and how their life has impacted yours?
By: Susan Deborah Schiller
In the Series, A Call to Adventure – Mini Memoir Ecourse – Write to Freedom
Waiting until after a funeral is too late to ask the questions you're yearning to find out! If you've lost a parent(s) you know what I mean.
Over 30-years ago, on a brisk December morning, a compelling sense of urgency demanded that I jump into my bright yellow AMC Hornet and make the 45-minute drive to St. Joseph hospital in Ann Arbor. I didn't realize that day would be the very last time I would see my father alive.
He had become sick while on summer vacation and although he lay as thin and pale as a Holocaust survivor, I never believed my father would die at such a young age.
Mom and Dad had spent hours and hour together prior to his death, and my father had made every possible financial and physical arrangement so that my mother would have a clear path to raising four teenagers by herself, if necessary.
We never lacked for anything, except his face and voice! A person's face and voice are windows into their soul, and even if they are gone, their soul remains with us in memories, but particularly in their words. We forget faces long before we forget words!
My dad did not leave any words. No good-byes for his children, either orally or in writing. What a regretful loss!
As I go through a small box of my dad's photos, letters, and papers I'm struck with the realization that he is still a stranger to me.
He died before I could ask him the most important questions!
What price would I pay today to know what made my dad's heart beat faster… what propelled him to accept a blind date with my mom… why did he dance ballet… how did he feel flying bomber airplanes in WWII… how did he feel about me… and so on.
Everyone one wants to belong somewhere, to know where they came from. We need more than pictures, as precious as those photos may be. We need a piece of their hearts, otherwise, a part of us dies and disappears with them!
If my father had left me his words, his stories, his legacy – what a difference it would have made! I don't want to make the same mistake. Today I'm nearly the same age as he was, when he died. None of us are guaranteed another hour, another day.
What would you pay to hear your parents' life story or the life story of your grandparents? How much would your children and grandchildren appreciate reading your life story?
I'd like to share one grandfather's legacy to his five grandchildren. Mr. James K. Flanagan composed this letter at the request of his daughter, in his 72nd year… just a few months before he suddenly died of a heart attack. It's addressed to his grandchildren.
1. Each one of you is a wonderful gift of God both to your family and to all the world. Remember it always, especially when the cold winds of doubt and discouragement fall upon your life.
2. Be not afraid . . . of anyone or of anything when it comes to living your life most fully. Pursue your hopes and your dreams no matter how difficult or "different" they may seem to others. Far too many people don't do what they want or should do because of what they imagine others may think or say. Remember, if they don't bring you chicken soup when you're sick or stand by you when you're in trouble, they don't matter. Avoid those sour-souled pessimists who listen to your dreams then say, "Yeah, but what if . . ." The heck with "what if. . ." Do it! The worst thing in life is to look back and say: "I would have; I could have; I should have." Take risks, make mistakes.
3. Everyone in the world is just an ordinary person. Some people may wear fancy hats or have big titles or (temporarily) have power and want you to think they are above the rest. Don't believe them. They have the same doubts, fears, and hopes; they eat, drink, sleep, and fart like everyone else. Question authority always but be wise and careful about the way you do it. — To read the rest of the letter, at Huffington Post, click here.
As you can probably imagine, your Day 15 activation, is to write a letter to your grandchildren (or whoever is most special to you that you want to receive your living legacy), specifically conveying your beliefs and values.
I'll be back in a couple days, with more of the Call to Adventure, Writing to Freedom in a Mini Memoir!
Living the adventure and choosing love today,
Sue
Susan Schiller knows how it feels to lose everything: marriage and family, church and reputation, finances and businesses, and more. Susan's upcoming, interactive memoir, "On the Way Home," tells the story of how she came to be known as "the most abused woman" her counselors had yet met and how she learned to navigate her way out of hell to a rich and satisfying life. In her lifetime, Susan has served in duties ranging from home school mom – to pastor – to full-time deliverance minister – and to Midwest regional prayer coordinator for a large international ministry. These days you can usually find Susan soaking in her favorite hot springs pool, reading a book (or several), blogging, baking bread, or hanging out with her family and friends. You can get a free copy of Susan's upcoming book, "On the Way Home" by registering here.
Copyright 2010-2014, Susan Schiller, http://TeamFamilyOnline.com. For reprint permission for any private or commercial use, in any form of media, please contact Susan Schiller.
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