I Will Be Your Hero
By: Susan Deborah Schiller
His whole body went stiff and he told me it was as if "someone else" had taken over his arms, legs, and speech. He was fighting to regain control. His limbs were paralyzed and he could barely move. Confusion, dizziness, and disorientation followed. He had been driving his truck, at the time, and whatever it was that entered his body attempted to drive him off the road.
For years, he had been on the strongest narcotics — the kinds and doses normally given only to terminal patients. During that time I was his 24/7 caregiver and there were many such events as described here. It was a continual "suicide watch" but so much more. This was after he was miraculously healed from a spinal cord injury and we were on the road as full-time itinerant ministers. It was the main reason I did not want to be on the road and I did not want to be a minister. We weren't ready… we needed time to heal.
No one else saw these episodes, and no one believed me. They wanted the smiling cowboy everyone knows and loves to minister to them. So what if he has a few flaws – everyone does, right? Just keep the showing running…
I heard God say,
“I want to be your hero. Apart from Me you can do nothing. I must be your highest desire, your highest aspiration. Dare to dream big dreams. Partner with Me – Let Me be your strength and power day to day. Press in. I have highly favored you. You have an appointment with Destiny. Breakthrough. Have no fear. I will rescue you, Little One.”
While everyone was focused on my husband, including me, God's eyes were on me when no one else noticed my pain. He saw what was happening behind closed doors. He heard my every prayer and collected every tear.
With or without adequate help, every survivor needs a real Hero – the kind of Hero our heavenly Bridegroom longs to be for us. We are the King's Bride. We have not been abandoned by Him and He longs to rescue us. Help is on the way! Dare to see Him as He is… longing to be with you, to comfort you, to lift you up.
I needed to hear my own words today, from my journal, written originally years ago. The real help for victims of sociopaths comes from the Hero who has promised to never leave us or forsake us… the One who promises to be with us always.
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With all my love,
Sue
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