Arctic Winter of Isolation and Renewal

Arctic Winter of Isolation

By: Susan Deborah Schiller

I felt trapped in an endless Arctic chill, both emotionally and externally. Outside my window, snow-laden apple trees tempted the elk, who foraged for Fall's last MacIntosh's and Golden's. My four-legged friends visited me every day, while my husband was away.They leapt and danced, singing soft, melodious sounds.

I was included in their merry family circle and my heart filled with awe and finally began to thaw.

Maybe you feel trapped, too? Perhaps you are a prisoner in your own home, as one woman named Laura shares. Maybe your health is scaring you, too?

It's nice to read in Psalm 91: 

You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, 6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. 7 A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. 8 You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked. 9 If you make the Most High your dwelling– even the LORD, who is my refuge– 10 then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent….

But is this Scripture only for the lucky ones? The ones who have friends, resources, and someone to lift them up? Do you feel on the outside, alone in the outer darkness, while everyone else goes on with their life? I did.

Alone in the wilderness, I heard Papa's whisper…

… To write my story, and with each sentence, each chapter and verse, I began to get my life back. I got well.

I couldn't have done it on my own. I listened to other people's stories, even as I told my own.

It was during that time of arctic isolation that I dreamed of a bridge of stories that would carry the next generation into a better world. And this is what I dreamed:

A whistle pierces the silence of the dusky mountain pass. It's the first passenger express train to cross the forested mountain range. I motion to the railway workers to come gather 'round.

As we watch, the train's engine shoots over the gap, rolling smoothly on the brand new rail bridge that was long, hard years in the making. In awe I watch each passenger car zip by on the whisper quiet rails, each window full of faces I can clearly see outlined by the car's light.

They are reading newspapers, playing cards, napping, and otherwise oblivious to the watchers gathered below. Their trip is smooth and they pay no attention to the bridge over the icy cold river below… this bridge has made it possible for them to cross over to a very good life.

In the shadow of the speeding train I take a moment to scan the faces of my team members. These friends and I have laid down everything we loved in our passion to build this bridge.

In burning sun, pelting hail, and snow up to our waist we hoisted each rail tie, and by hand laid this track over the great divide between fear-based living and a love-based life.

So many times each of us had wanted to quit! A few of our best workers had lost their lives, right on this track. It was dangerous work and I could give none of them a guarantee they would finish alive. I remember the joy and pride of accomplishment as the first train covered the gap. Although no one would ever know the price we builders had paid, the world would be a better place!

I dreamed this vision in 2009, a year when I fell very sick, nearly to death. My husband was fooling around with other women and I was home-bound in rural Montana in a camper surrounded by mountains of snow. I felt trapped in every single way: health, finances, transportation, and limited social contact.

This was our camper in the mountains of Northwestern Montana. The Arctic chill kept the temperature below zero far too often that year. 

Each sentence we write, little by little, we are bridging the gap to a life beyond fear. We are writing to freedom, you see, exposing the darkness, shattering the illusions, and creating a new world.

It takes persistence. It doesn't happen right away. Resistance is relentless. It isn't easy. It isn't safe. It isn't comfortable. It's worth it, though.

If you make the Most High your dwelling– even the LORD, who is my refuge– then no harm will befall you, no disaster will come near your tent…. (Psalm 91)

There is something powerful about writing our stories, about rising up to see what Heaven is doing and saying in our lives, and then writing it down. We are rewriting the future!

As you listen to that still, small voice inside your heart… what is Heaven saying to you today? What is one word, one line, one paragraph you can add to your memoir? That is a living Word – a Word that is creative! Write it down and let it do what it is meant to accomplish in your world. 🙂

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With all my love,

Sue

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Tagged as: Choosing Love Today, Create Your World, Deborah White Dove